Events

Who the class is for?

Appropriate Couples

The Seven Principles Couples Program is appropriate for couples contemplating engagement, for pre-marital couples, for couples living together, and for couples who have been together or married for decades. Classes can be offered targeting specific demographics or they can combine couples with widely varied relational and age histories. The author has taught classes comprised of both homogeneous and heterogeneous groups of couples. Each work well. Homogeneous groups have the advantage of participants sharing similar stage-of-life experiences and relatedness. Diverse groups have the advantage of working through the material with couples in different phases and lifestyles, which normalizes the ongoing process of working on relationships and dealing with perpetual problems.

Inappropriate Couples

Psycho-educational classes are not appropriate for all couples, including those with severe relationship distress, significant emotional or physical abuse, serious emotional or mental health problems, relationships where one or both partners are actively addicted to drugs or alcohol, and relationships with serious compulsive behavior with gambling, sexual acting out, and other disruptive behaviors. Class announcements should state that the class is not appropriate when couples are experiencing these issues. Should the presence of these situations be discovered during the class, a referral should be made for individual or couples psychotherapy.

Benefits of participating in the program for couples

There are many benefits of offering The Seven Principles Couples Program. These include:

• It provides structure, motivation, and accountability to continue working through the book. With busy schedules, it is easy to let reading the book and working through exercises slide, while a class format encourages more active involvement and ongoing participation by following a schedule.
• It can be encouraging to work on one’s relationship in the context of other couples that are doing the same thing.
• It may be less threatening than seeking couples therapy and fits into an enrichment model that couples may be familiar with. While The Seven Principles Couples Program is not a substitute for therapy, it can soften the entry into working on their relationship and getting help without the stigma that some still have toward seeking therapy. It can also become a bridge into therapy for those couples that desire more personal assistance
  than the class can provide. Reading the book and working through the exercises can provide a strong foundation for pursuing therapy from the Gottman perspective, as the basic concepts and methods are already familiar to the couple and have been tried and tested, which may enhance and expedite a therapeutic process later.
• Signing up for a class on marriage and relationships also eliminates some of the uncertainty and hesitation some couples have about working on their relationship on their own, or about seeking therapy because there are often no clearly defined goals, expectations, structure, or duration. In contrast, a class format does have clearly articulated goals, expectations, and time frame.
• A class format encourages both partners to work on their relationship rather than one partner alone reading the book without the other partner’s participation.
• The Seven Principles Couples Program provides a great opportunity for pre-marital couples to learn skills that can enrich their relationship through a lifetime together.